I had lost 40 pounds the last time I updated this lovely blog. And over the course of the past year I went slightly down and then back up, and up... and up. And one year later I can say that I've managed to keep 25 of those pounds off of my body. Which is not great (I made no forward progress). But it is not bad either (I am not totally back at square one).
There are a lot of things in my life that are constantly in flux (career, friendships, life goals, maturity, Blackbird, etc). And that is fine. Things work out well for a while and then something slips away and you have to work to pick the reins up again. Which is where I feel like I am right now in many respects. But I have found that it is easier to focus on all these different things when I am living healthy. Because my brain is clearer. I feel more focused and motivated. I'm not worried about why my clothes don't fit.
For the past year I've felt (very irrationally) afraid that if I wasn't careful I would let my healthy lifestyle take over my life. Having a full time job doesn't leave a lot of free time and it is a bit overwhelming to use up your free time at the gym. And looking back on the past year I've realized that I've spent even more time feeling afraid that I have no control over myself and a general sadness about being unhealthy. And if I have to fear losing my free time to being healthy so that I don't have to fear dying because I'm unhealthy - well, that seems like a good trade to me.
All these things boiled down add up to many reasons why it is a great time to get healthy. And here are some more...
I feel less stressed when I exercise on a regular basis.
Dairy makes me feel sick. I don't want to eat it anymore.
I want to fit into smaller clothing and not have to worry about my pants fitting in the morning.
I want to feel like I am in control of my feelings - and this means controlling emotional eating.
What does this mean? I'm going to be harder on myself because this time I mean business. My friend Holly talks about "tough love," and quite frankly this is exactly the mind set I have to take. To see results I need to make changes and I need to make them now. I need to take myself seriously.
So. Lifestyle change. Here is the plan....
1. Eat a variety of 7 healthy foods per day. I was doing this in September and October and it felt great. The categories/foods are: Beans, Nuts, Berries, Oats/Whole Grains, Spinach, Yogurt, and veggies. I do count spinach and veggies as separate categories, as while spinach is a powerful food I don't want it to be the only vegetable I eat per day. Getting nuts and beans in every day can be difficult, so instead I may have two servings of berries, etc. But the goal will be to get in 7 different types of these very healthy foods.
2. Go to the gym 5 x per week. This is something Dan and I have been trying to do and I know the hold up is me. I can find an excuse at least once per week as to why we shouldn't go. I am my own worst enemy in this situation, especially when I have a lovely husband who will go to the gym with me. So.
3. Goodbye dairy and splenda. I am not ready to say goodbye %100 to fried foods and pastries - especially when I know how to count them (points wise) and I don't eat them very often. And limiting too many things will make this feel like a diet, which I absolutely do not want. But I gorge on dairy on the weekends and it makes me feel sick every time. I can't control myself with it, so it's time to get rid of it. And as for splenda - I keep hearing horrible things about sweeteners from the doctors at the hospital. I would like to try and cut it out. And thinking about it - I put it in my coffee, I have at least one diet soda per day, and it sweetens the lemonade that Dan and I drink. I just use way too much of it. The hardest part of this will definitely be the lemonade, as it is what I drink at home, but...
4. Drink more water. This was one of the few goals I made when I started dieting that I have really stuck with. I have found that while I drink a lot of water at work, however, I barely drink any water when I am at home. So I am going to replace my lemonade drinking with good old fashioned water. Sounds boring. Probably will be boring. But also better for me in the long run.
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